FROM THE MUTTERING SPORTS CRANK: A FEW WORDS ON BOBBY V

Posted: March 10, 2012 in MLB, Professional Sports, Red Sox
Tags: ,

By: Mark Harriman, Senior Editor

NOWHEREINPARTICULAR- After sifting through the mixed up files that belong to this muttering sports crank, I just found a note card that reminded me to tell you about my thoughts on newly minted Red Sox skipper Bobby Valentine.

You may cheer this hire by Larry Lucchino -I was on your side, Ben- or view it strictly as a two year experiment. Before the 2012 season commences, anyone can make a case for either side.

But from a sports writer’s perspective, the Valentine administration is going to be deliciously good !

Deliciously juicy. Downright fun. And good for the economy, too.

Why, you ask?

Because this guy can’t help but talk. And talk he does on any number of subjects, from baseball to the real world. And intelligently so.

But while Bobby V may be an articulate intellectual -there’s no doubting that- he’s that buddy of yours who will always have an answer for you whether you need it or not. He just can’t help himself. It’s part of his DNA. And his tenure in Boston -however long- is going to be filled with enough material to single-handedly put an end to the newspaper industry’s tailspin.

Put it this way: One denizen of the keyboard recently joked that Valentine will be saying so much -about his team, about baseball, about ballroom dancing and public safety and other diverse topics – that every news organization will have to hire a full-time writer just to cover The Skipper and his daily offerings.

And I say that if Bobby V and his mouth can create a few more jobs in this tough economy, so be it. I’ll take a hundred more Valentines and their candid, but often ill-timed and controversial remarks. It will get tedious after a time, but think about the jobs, jobs, jobs. That’s what it’s all about these days. And who doesn’t need one?

In Bobby V you are not getting a manager like Terry Francona who would rather eat dirty socks than say anything negative about one of his players in public.

Nope. You’re getting someone who will lay it all out there for all to hear as if the governor switch between gray matter and oral cavity had been extracted by a skillful surgeon. The days of the player protection racket in Boston are over.

And this is going to be an absolute bonanza for us reporters. Slow news day? Stick a microphone or a camera in front of Bobby V and ask an innocuous question.

And Bingo! You’ve got Bingo!

If one is lucky, a week’s worth of material is there for the taking, easy as pie.

Your editors will think you’re a genius. Until they catch-on, of course. Then taking afternoons or mornings off will be by the boards. Those editors always want more.

Here’s how to listen to Bobby Valentine when he gives a standard ‘No comment’ response. Wait about four or five beats. Wait for it. Wait for it.

Then Bang! He’ll expound on the very subject he just tried to avoid. Very un-Tito like.

It won’t matter that someone in his clubhouse will be hacked off about him spilling the beans. It won’t matter what controversy he stirs up. He’s Bobby V and you’re going to hear him roar.

And roar. And roar.

Alert Washington about this impending plunge in unemployment. The stock markets will soar. Greece will be debt free by the time his contract expires.

Oh, this is going to be good.

About these ads

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s